Bad luck

I pray to god everyday. "Please meet me with him god. I miss him." I know that God always listen and that's true. I met you then. I ask for a ride and you let me in. We talked. We laughed. I felt so much awkward cause it had been so long not to see you. I felt like wanna hug you close like I did but i cant. You're not alone.

You won't try to save me
You just want to hurt me
and leave me desperate
You taught my heart sense I never knew I had
I cant forget the time that I was lost and depressed from the awful truth
How do you do it?
You're my heroine
-Silverstein

I always think that I would never ever love someone like you. I never try to stop loving you even you have 100 girlfriends. But to other? I hate them when I know they found someone else. And the feeling? Gone.
I dont judge you, stalk you, sending you much message. Maybe I call you once a month just to know how you are. That's all. I just love you like that.

"I still care about you. I think about you all the time. I’m praying for you constantly. I want so badly to know you’re being taken care of. I wish you the best in life, not because you’ll surely find it, but because you deserve it. You deserve so much. I just wish you knew how much I miss you."
-Adam, Owl City

I said it was fate that we met. But you said it was a bad luck. I laughed. How could you be so rude? :)))
But then I realize that was true. Seeing your face make my "thinking about you all the time" phase come again. But there's a positive point. You promise me will always answer my telephone every 25th of the month. That was good.
Aaaaah. I dont know, maybe I'm just confused now. But overall. It's nice to meet you

a letter

Hey, how are you? I hope you're good. How is yours? Is she fine? I hope so.
I don't know why but last night i dreamt about you. You hug me like you used to in the past. And now I realize, I'm missing you. And I think write a letter for you would be the best idea to make me feel better. Here it is.
I was thinking that when we're getting closer I shouldn't wish to be yours. I know you well. I knew you didn't want it.
And that's true, wasn't it? You went away again. After you left me like that for twice. Turn your back and make me felt so crazy. Can you help me understand? I always try to understanding you. As best as I could. And I did it. I was living my life, moving on from my third broken heart caused by you.
But I keep try to reach you just for knowing how are you, how is your school.
At our second anniversary, I was trying to call you. You didn't answer it. 2 days later someone told me that you've already had your new girlfriend.
It's great, i thought. I knew i was hurt but there's nothing I could do except smiling for your happiness right?
I know It's hard for me, like always. But I also know that I'll be stronger day by day only for you. For everything that you want me to do.
Just be happy for your life okay? I watch you, keep you, everyday forever.
One thing you should've know, I can't be moved only for you. <3

Sincerely
I. S. R.

He.... He was mine. Though he isn't anymore... It's just like.. He was someone that I hug when he was sad or I was.. We were laughing together. Holding each other.
He knew everything about me. I knew everything about him. We fight we broke but we get up together.
He was my angel. Seeing him with someone else is kinda weird but.. Yeah. Here we are. Walking in our own ways. I loved you. That's true.
I'm missing you now. But i've mine and you've yours. Lets start our own new life.
I'll never ever forget you. Thanks. 831

What should I do now?
You let me down
Yes you let me down
Baby you lie to me
Lie on everything that I believe

Should I leave you?
Should I hate you?
No. I can't
It's just too hard to think clearly

I'm not trying to pinch you
But my heart's feeling so blue
I'm trying to start a new day
But you push my dream away

I thougt you were just a boy
Ran to me and begged for cares
I love you
But I just cant be with you like this anymore

a little bit tired

Kamu ga ngerti perasaan aku. Takut. Kamu ga ngerasain! Gmana rasanya dianggep penghancur kehidupan orang lain. Gmana rasanya disalah2in terus sm org lain. Aku cape. Aku ga mau ngerasain lg gmana kesiksanya ky gt. Km ngerti ga sih?? :((
Aku ga tenang, aku ga bsa mikir, aku GA BAHAGIA sekarang. Hhhhhh..
Aku harus gimana atulah. Ya allah bantuin.
Aku ga bisa kaya biasa. Hati aku kaya kepndet gt. Perasaan ak kaya yang terkikis gitu aja. Apa gra2 terlalu takut? Saking traumanya gitu?
There's never a right time to say goodbye. But I dont feel the way I once felt about you. It's not you it's me. We gotta go our seperate ways. We should be apart baby, I just can't do it. -,-